too much typing—since 2003


R.I.P. Johnny Ramone

Sadly, I originally wrote this a couple years back: recycling Ramones tributes is only too appropriate.

And in the Garden of Concrete in that day there did dwell a serpent, a creature most subtle and tasteful among all creatures, who did call out to lo the many sons of Ramone, numbering amongst them those who were called Joey, and Dee Dee, and Johnny, and Tommy, and didst say unto them; "Gabba gabba yea I say unto you, wherefore dost thou hold always thy fingers in the same positions upon thy instruments of strings; and wherefore also dost thou play always upon thy instrument of hitting in always the same manner; and never to play in any other manner upon thy instruments, neither varying nor changing thy 'groove,' as the kids call it these days?"

And Johnny didst speak therefore; and said he unto the serpent: that the LORD himself had said unto them that of all the chords of the guitar, they shalt know only the three, and that they shall knoweth not of the fourth chord; and that of the drum they shalt know only of the beat, and never yet knoweth of the fill. And Tommy did say, "Huh?"; and Joey did beateth upon the brats with the bat of basehitting; and the wily serpent did tempt them, yea even unto the mysteries of the fourth chord, and the drum fill, and the chaos that ariseth thereof; and there was much weeping and gnashing of teeth in the Garden of Concrete; and lo their innocence was cast out, and their days thenceforth spent in restless sleeping, and their nights in fearsome noisemaking, and eating of chicken vindaloo; yet no longer couldst they rock.

And the serpent bought a real nice suit.

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